Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize