her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
