we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
