Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
