dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
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We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
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I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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