is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize