Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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