i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
