I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
