At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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