I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I touched a dick in church today
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
