My hand turned me down
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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