thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
