He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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