Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
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you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
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I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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