Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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