Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize