Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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