im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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