I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
