...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
