I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
