Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
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Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
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Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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