More tranny stories later!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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