Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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