Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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