Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
