we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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