ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
