the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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