A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
