Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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