All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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