I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize