About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
