Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
