Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
