ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Randomize
