I will die if light touches me.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
