is your mom at the bar?
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
