we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I supernannyed him into submission
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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