I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
