does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize