Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
