Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
