I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize