it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize