I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
