I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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