I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
