Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Randomize
